10-23-2023, 04:31 PM
(This post was last modified: 10-23-2023, 04:32 PM by AbstractTraitorHero.)
![[Image: 3f010aa8e5d6f6d9ab20b1198f568039.jpg]](https://i.pinimg.com/564x/3f/01/0a/3f010aa8e5d6f6d9ab20b1198f568039.jpg)
I can't breath.
I don't need to, I've never needed to. Yet, when I close my eyes & when I sleep surrounded by the warmth of candles & the scent of incense, I so desperately feel that need to breath. Scratching, clawing, tugging at my throat, this sense of panic swirling within a darkness that feels so heavy.
I can't breath
That sensation of suffocation that haunts during the night, that creeps into my waking hours. Whenever I stare down into from where I was drudged, whenever I stand near those stairs this tightening within my core, my chest, my throat. Where lungs don't exist, where nothing should make this feeling, I feel it closing in on me & I wait for it to end in my bed-moonlight to grace my skin.
The dying warmth of Amada's light, signaling the end of 'rest' for the body & not the mind.
I can't breath.
I admitted this feeling, to others, to another. I do not think they can understand. I do not think they see anything, when they stare upon me, knowing my skull to be so empty.
I'm so tired.
I invited someone to dinner.
I don't want to sleep for a few more nights.
I'm so tired & tonight?
I can't breath.
Yet, I'm wide awake, what lays beneath this city cackles, mocking me for my ascent from it.